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…UH OH, TESCO!
AND YOU WERE DOING SOOOOOO WELL…

(Submitted by a wonderful, concerned neighbour)

…UH OH, TESCO!

AND YOU WERE DOING SOOOOOO WELL…

(Submitted by a wonderful, concerned neighbour)

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You know you’ve made it when…

I COULD CRY.
GOING TO GO AND STEAL* ONE RIGHT NOW!
*NOT REALLY.**
**…BUT REALLY.

You know you’ve made it when…

I COULD CRY.

GOING TO GO AND STEAL* ONE RIGHT NOW!

*NOT REALLY.**

**…BUT REALLY.

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THANK YOU JAMES!!!!! I hope now tonight i will be able to finally get to the pies and quiche & not have to have Doritos again for dinner…. Ax

POST APOCALYPTIC SUPERMARKET SWEEP.

THANK YOU JAMES!!!!! I hope now tonight i will be able to finally get to the pies and quiche & not have to have Doritos again for dinner…. Ax

POST APOCALYPTIC SUPERMARKET SWEEP.

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Mission accomplished!

Walked in this morning and can you adam and eve it, they’ve actually hire a team of staff and the place is full. I actually laughed out loud when I walked around in amazement. Great blog, great job. 

THE OLD WAYS OF CHAOS ARE BROWN BREAD (DEAD).

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OH MY… 

HAGGERSTON IS ON THE MAP. NOW CABBIES WILL HAVE A LANDMARK AT LAST.

BUT SADLY I WILL HAVE TO MOVE HOUSE.

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Thought I would share the Tesco misery we suffer down West

http://tescorocks.tumblr.com

SMUGFACE VON LANDROVER-VOGUE-LA-FARQUHAR FROM WEST LONDON - YOU CAN KEEP YOUR DELICIOUS CHOCOLATE FONDANT DESSERTS IN PREMIUM-BLACK PACKAGING.

WE JUST WANT MILK AND INSTANTLY-RECOGNISABLE VEGETABLES.

CAN I COME ROUND FOR DINNER THOUGH?

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Anonymous said: I hope this doesn't sound too snippy, but why don't you support your local corner shop instead of putting up with this hell on earth? I *know* there are plenty of other places to shop in Haggerston ;-)

GOLDHILL WINES NEXT DOOR - MAKE THE GUY LAUGH AND GET A FREE CHOMP.

DISCLAIMER: DEFINITELY DON’T TRY TO DO THIS.

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I once got held hostage inside this Tesco. A ‘youth’ wanted some beers (on New Year’s Day) and when the staff refused to serve him he got angry so they locked the doors until the police came. They also locked me and an elder gentleman with the very angry young man inside the Tesco for a solid ten minutes.

THEY MIGHT NOT HAVE TEA BAGS, BUT THEY DO DO KETTLES.

*DRUM ROLL*

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Tesco, every little (very very little) helps.

USE YOUR IMAGINATION, PETER. 

Tesco, every little (very very little) helps.

USE YOUR IMAGINATION, PETER. 

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This is Lee, the London manager for all Tesco express shops. He said that he’s seen the blog, thinks it’s funny, but that they sacked the old shop manager two weeks ago and that the new one will hopefully improve the experience for the customers and “improve trade”. He asked me what I thought of my experience and I said I was disappointed, everything was in order and I was expecting chaos. Let’s start a movement to bring back the old manager. I want to see the Haggerston Tesco in the epoch of its glory days!

A MAN WITH A CLIPBOARD IS A MAN THAT MEANS BUSINESS.
AND IF  YOU’RE READING, LEE:
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Fridges always permanently locked open. Nothing quite like buying Luke warm bacon.

AT PEAK TIMES, THE PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE TUSSLE FOR THE GAP BETWEEN THE PIZZAS AND THE READY MEALS HAS LED ME TO ORDERING TAKEAWAY.
TUSSLE HAS JUST BECOME MY FAVOURITE WORD.
TUSSLE.
TUSS. LE.
TUSSLE.

Fridges always permanently locked open. Nothing quite like buying Luke warm bacon.

AT PEAK TIMES, THE PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE TUSSLE FOR THE GAP BETWEEN THE PIZZAS AND THE READY MEALS HAS LED ME TO ORDERING TAKEAWAY.

TUSSLE HAS JUST BECOME MY FAVOURITE WORD.

TUSSLE.

TUSS. LE.

TUSSLE.

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I tried to buy carrots the other day for carrot cake at about 2 pm, couldn’t find any. Decided to investigate further and look at the tags to see where the carrots normally live. None of the bins had carrot tags on them. None. Eight different varieties of onion, no carrots?

THERE ARE SOMETHINGS THAT SIMPLY CAN’T BE SUBSTITUTED.

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Fixed?

So I just went to our favourite place on earth.  And wow, there’s been some changes:

* A staff member who was stacking shelves apologised for being in the way and moved so I could get to some produce.  This has *never* happened before.

* I saw two people being helped to find items by staff members

* There appears to be a new manager walking around (he may be new, or he may have previously just been in the back)

* There were two other staff members making the shelves look smart (straightening the items, etc.)

* There’s things to buy on the shelves, including milk, which never normally seems to be there.

* The buy-one-get-one-free shelf has more than one item on it.

How long will it last!?

Paul

FANTASTIC.

WE DARED TO DREAM, PAUL. WE DARED TO DREAM.

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At least the person who stacks the shelves has a sense of humour.

I WANT THIS TO BE DELIBERATE. WITH EVERY OUNCE OF MY BODY AND SOUL, I WANT THIS TO BE DELIBERATE.

At least the person who stacks the shelves has a sense of humour.

I WANT THIS TO BE DELIBERATE. WITH EVERY OUNCE OF MY BODY AND SOUL, I WANT THIS TO BE DELIBERATE.

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FRIDGE-D

The fridge doors at Tesco Haggerston are incapable of sliding shut. EVER. Perhaps a vat of vaseline would help? I mean, I’m all for hotter summers but I also think polar bears are kind of cute… What a juxtaposition Tesco’s must find itself in - sell more BBQs or save the planet. Decisions!

I VOTE POLAR BEAR. AT LEAST THE MAJESTIC KILLERS HAVE SOMETHING IN THEM.